2 FANG GONE: Cool Kota Kicks Fang In The Teeth

“Want to See Elephant Dung?” 18 castaways are dumped out in the plains of Gabon, and a classic tribe pick’em leads to one of the most lopsided tribal splits ever seen.

  • The tribe divisions are like high school all over again. Kota is smart, pretty, popular, and good at everything, and Fang is dumb, ugly, and can’t even manage to go outside without nearly decapitating themselves.
  • The idea of sending the castaways out in regular clothes is a great one…at least in theory. Was it really necessary to see Randy’s banana hammock while he strains to push the giant ball?
  • Speaking of Randy, his complaints about Gillian being a 60 year old woman were hilarious – considering he looks like he’s about 59.
  • Having Crystal is an interesting dynamic, especially considering a more obscure Olympic gold medalist is going to be less recognizable than, say, Gary Hogeboom. But was her gold medal in bowling or something?! How does an Olympic runner have trouble running up a hill and barely keep up with a 60-year old woman who was literally being pushed up?!
  • Crystal seems a pretty poor judge of character. She inexplicably chose Susie ahead of several obviously better fit players, then turns around and incessantly praises Dan for his brains. Dan – the guy who keeps walking around in a tie for no reason whatsoever. Dan – the guy who spent hours digging around in a lake for an idol when the clue said it would be in a sandy crater. Yeah, that Dan.
  • Few things are sadder than watching Super Smash Brothers Melee champion Kenny stutter, stumble, and trip his way through the game. Worse still, right when he thinks he’s about to get his first bit of action since high school he gets the equivalent of a Final Smash and Michelle is KO’d.
  • GC proved to be very interesting and likable…for about 8 minutes. Showing him as a self-professed bad kid finding himself and emerging into a leader was a great fake-out.
  • You hate to pick on the older players, but playing the game with Gillian has to feel like when your mom chaperoned school field trips. As important as the social game is, you’d think someone would know better than to suggest people eat things found in elephant poo. And that accent was enough to make you wish they’d have casted Rob Mariano instead.

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